@Equinox That could be a good thing though!!!
The more you will learn about programming and the more you may know what it is really all about, maybe you will stop being so paranoid and aggressive toward others if you understand better what they do. Maybe you also will be able to do what you always tell others to do for you, or realize the thing you wanted was not such a big deal to do without programming knowledge
In any case, if you have trouble learning the basics or if you need advices you can ask us I will gladly help anyone getting into that field
If you have the choice in your programming course start with the language C do not start with a scripting language or a pure object oriented language like Java because C will teach you memory management and it will give you some very healthy reflexes, once you know C you can learn pretty much anything you want knowing you already have solid fundamentals and it all will be much easier for you. Also C if you have a good school wont take more than a month or two to learn.
Good luck with your lessons it really is a good initiative, and do not give up like most people do!
Sometimes it may become hard to get your head around things like pointers (I never had any problem with those but that is a common struggle) and stuff like that: ask for help but never give up! Before you know it you will love programming and realize it really is not like in the movies